Date: March 3rd, 2027 Subject: James, age 36
As much I wanted to return to Agnes right away, I held off on it because Levi was right…I wasn’t acting like myself…I felt different. So for the next week, I slept restlessly and focused on perfecting my equations. When I couldn’t sleep and didn’t feel like working, I used a punching bag to keep my mind occupied. It felt good to take all of my anger out on something besides another person. Levi, Elizabeth, and even the doc had been steering clear of me and for good reasons. I was moody, irritable, and reckless. All symptoms of withdrawal…which only proved Dr. Newcomb’s theory…I was addicted to the machine.
When I first came to CFT, I had one mission and one mission only…to go back in time and save my parents. Instead I found Agnes and meeting her had changed my whole life. I just kept thinking back to the old woman I’d met as a child. She was so different from her younger counterpart. Was she bitter because of me? And if that was the case, then why didn’t I go back to her at some point? Did something happen to me?
It was like a puzzle and I had all the pieces…but fitting them together was the hard part. I knew there was only one way I’d get answers…
I waited until everyone fell asleep then I quietly tiptoed down the hallway and into the lab that housed the Invention Constructor. I stared up at the machine anxiously. It looked foreboding in the dimly lit room and for some reason, I felt afraid. Before I could change my mind, I typed in my new formula. Then on impulse, I changed the password before stepping onto the platform…no one would be able to operate the machine now, except for me. That meant there would be no more interruptions.
I’d stay with her this time…even if it killed me.